A Small Practice in Editing.

I have spent my holidays editing essays and applications for clients. Editing is a crucial skill in the workplace and classroom that must be developed. So, I thought this would make an interesting small practice for the cyberworld. It is a paragraph of a new piece I am working on called The Disappointment.  If you would like to giive your input, I would appreciate it. 90% of writing is revision and it can seem dauting to the inexperienced. Go ahead and give it a try, you might be surprised about your eye.

 

           Victor held his newborn daughter in his arms after delivering her. She was healthy and had long enough lashes for the nurses to comment. When he knew he would be a father for the fourth time, he prayed for a boy like his first-born.  Boys outnumbered girls on his side and he already had two. This girl, Catherine, was a disappointment. He did not want to look at her, but had to pretend to be a proud father as his co-workers congratulated him. Frowning would not be acceptable. He squeezed her sides under the blanket. As if accepting the challenge, Catherine did not cry.

About bluebeadpublications

I am a writer living in Miami who loves reading, writing, and editing. If you need a ghostwriter, I am your chick.

3 responses to “A Small Practice in Editing.”

  1. elizabeth.aram says :

    Hi bluebead 🙂
    I really enjoy reading your blog. I always learn something new, so I decided to nominate you for the inspiring blogger of the year award! You can see it on my blog, http://www.theartofpsychology.wordpress.com. To accept, just repost the award, mention who nominated you and link to their blog, then write 7 things about yourself. You should also nominate 15 others and let them know! Thanks for putting in the effort for all your readers, hope you have many more!
    All the best 🙂
    -Elizabeth

  2. Kozo says :

    Interesting. I like the scenario you are constructing here. I want to know what the relationship will be like in the future.
    I would take out “was a disappointment.” Just let the fact that he does not look at her convey the disappointment.

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